She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
