what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
