i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
