i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
