So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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