did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
