You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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