i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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