I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
