So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
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When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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