Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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