i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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