to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
