...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
