Pappa wants mamma naked
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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