The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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