iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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