you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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