There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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