oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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