Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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