The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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