I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
