yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
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