My first STD was from a foam party
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
how does that bad decision feel?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
