Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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