For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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