when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
