We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
