i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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