So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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