happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
