I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
