Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?