**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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