school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
