he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
We are all done wearing pants today
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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