oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
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you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
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I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize