His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
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