So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
