You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
