Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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