when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
