do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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