Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
