If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
