Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize