Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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