Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
