Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
