I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
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I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
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I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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